“It’s like I’m spinning.”

This is what I heard from two women in my workshop Monday, and it struck me… that was once ME!

About 8 years ago, I was living my dream as a mother of three kids and co-founder of a successful business in New York. 

But my dream life was also incredibly demanding.

Every morning was a rush to feed, dress, and get the kids off to school in the nick of time. At work, I'd perform at full throttle, barely taking time to eat lunch at my desk.

The evenings? Shuttling the kids to sports and music lessons, helping with homework, and then tackling the dinner, bath, and bed routine.

When it was finally time for me, I only had enough energy left to pour myself a glass of wine, work MORE, and fall asleep (sometimes at my computer). While I wouldn't have traded any of those moments, I always felt like I was on a hamster wheel.

And I was exhausted.

Then, for my 40th birthday, my husband surprised me with a week-long yoga retreat at the beach.

That changed my life.

But one night during the retreat, on the eve of my actual birthday, I woke up at 3am in a panic. I thought to myself:

I love my life! I am successful in business and fulfilled by motherhood. So why do I feel something is missing?

What happened to ME? When was the last time I worked out and felt good about my body? Why was I no longer traveling to places that inspired me? What happened to my joyful mojo, the hidden adventurer inside of me?

So I grabbed a pen and wrote—just like Hamilton—like I was running out of time.

I WAS running out of time!

I frantically scribbled out the most adventurous, athletic, wildest "bucket list" I could think of:

-Climb Mount Kilimanjaro

-Run across the Grand Canyon

-Get back to playing piano 

-Learn how to play chess (well)

-Live in Italy one day

The moment I PAUSED and took time for MYSELF, my mind remembered exactly what makes ME happy.

Still, the voice inside my head said:

How will I find the time to travel for these challenges, let alone train for them? Where am I going to get the confidence and motivation to accomplish these feats? How will I get over the guilt of doing something just for me?

But I resolved to at least try.

And so, I went on a journey to give myself permission to train in between the responsibilities of kids and work, to plan in between meetings and school drop-offs, to allow myself the space and time to do the things I loved, for ME.

To be ME.

And guess what happened?

I started to check off every single crazy, wild idea on that list!

You can too. 

You can set your intentions, and then your attention to those things will help you activate them.

You can manifest your desires.

You can enjoy this one life more and do what YOU love.

With fierce love,
Alison