I was in CVS pharmacy yesterday looking for Mother’s Day cards.

This is what I found.

“I love you so much Mom!” - Pure love.

“You’ve taught me a lot and I appreciate you.” - Pure thanks.

“Mom, I’m sorry that your gray hair and wrinkles are mostly from me.” - Pure truth. I mean…apology.

I know which one I should have chosen, but I left the store thinking I’ll write my own, considering how reductive a few words on a card actually are in describing the depth of what it means to be: MOTHER.

Whether you have a mother, are a mother, want to be a mother, or love a mother figure, you can relate to the nuances of what that role entails.

There are no rule books, guide books, or “shoulds.”

In raising twin girls and a boy, being a mother is my greatest accomplishment, my most gratifying job, and hands down, a role that takes up the most space in my heart.

It also gets really hard. And can be confusing. And full of worry.

But what I’ve learned is that the only constant in parenting is loving your children.

First, being a mom means hearing what your kids say, but also going deeper and listening to what they mean.

And knowing that every single phase in the parenting journey is just that. A phase.

For example, when my twins had a hard time moving from bottle to sippy cup, it was only “for now.”

When my son struggled to move from his crib to his big boy bed, it was only “for now.”

When my kids struggled with the pains of navigating middle school, it was only “for now.”

Insert anything you are going through with your child right now here _____. And then add the words “for now.”

Second, being a mom also means picking your battles.

Ask yourself if whatever you’re focused on in that moment will matter 10 years from now. If not, let it go.

Remember that they are not giving you a hard time, they are having a hard time.

Third, being a mom means loving yourself too.

It means that you are guiding your kids and they want your happiness as much as their own.

Being a role model means choosing your own joy, playing more, and being as present as you can be in your own life.

I worked in the parenting space for 15 years and witnessed thousands of moms with different perspectives on motherhood and learned that there is no one definition for mother.

Merriam-Webster can’t grasp it in a dictionary, and neither can a Hallmark card at CVS.

Just remember that the only constant in parenting is love!!

With fierce love,
Alison